This week's featured outfit: a slim fit travel-ready look complete with weekend bag, backpack, and kicks so fresh they're declared to customs. This tailored Uniqlo OCBD is comfortable enough to survive transit while presenting something more than "neck pillow casual" once you arrive. Paired with Uniqlo jeans, a North Face backpack, and Nike Flyknit racers, the end result is a tapered silhouette made of movement-ready casualwear. I chose to dress in stark contrast colors to lend the outfit an aura of sophistication, placing visual emphasis on subtle detailing rather than flashy, surface-level distractions. 

Understated, comfortable, and monochrome stylish: in other words, the perfect look for both journey and destination.

Some may disagree, but between you and me, we're right. If you want to dress well and be a fashion cool kid, black and white outfits aren't just a good thing - they're the only thing. It's just that easy. If anyone gives you a hard time, simply remind them that your tailored monochrome dress makes you automatically more fashionable than they are. Like night following day, it's merely a fact of life: colors are for nerds.

Oh, I'm sorry - was that hard to read? I'll say it again: colors are for nerds.

It's just that simple: if you want to be a cool fashion kid, ditch the hues, and go straight for desaturated neutrals. White? Great. Grey? Getting there. Navy? Game-time decision. 

But the inky dark midnight of a Steve Jobs turtleneck? Now we're talking.

I'll explain.

While Mr. Jobs made his fortune in computing, no living soul would remote consider him a nerd. Therefore, at n=1, there's a direct correlation between not wearing colors and not being a nerd. Even the text I use to emphasize exactly who colors are for (read: nerds) agrees that bold black simply works better.

So, if you're ready to throw off the chains of nerddom and enter the shining monochrome Valhalla that is "cool fashion," here's my advice:

  1. Start small. Burn everything you own that looks out of place at a gallery opening. 
  2. Make a commitment. Take the ashes from the bonfire in Step 1 and smear them on anything you spared from the flames. Fashion demands purity.
  3. Embrace variety. There's a lot you can do between white and black. For example: light grey; dark grey; 48 other shades of grey. 
  4. Seek positive growth. Thanks to your new fashion-forward lifestyle choices, you are now better than most people you meet. Make snide comments about their sweatpants, especially ones that aren't black, white, or grey shade #17.
  5. Never stop learning. Scientists have recently developed a black so black it physically can't reflect light. Just imagine what that'd look like on a wide-brim sun hat. Or a pair of oversized circular sunglasses. OR EVEN A CHOKER GOD FASHION IS SO COOL.

With these 5 steps and the proper thought conditioning, you'll be a cool fashion kid in no time! Isn't self-expression fun? 

 

Comment

AS RAKESTRAW | The personal site of Alex Rakestraw.